atomic_fungus (atomic_fungus) wrote,

#4654: This one is not coming easy.

The story I've been working on for the past few weeks is being difficult.

Last night I wrote a scene that was about two pages long, and then promptly excised it and started over. It didn't even make it to the printer; I cut it before I'd finished writing for the night. It's not the first time I had to do that with this one, and it is very rare for me to do that kind of thing with any story, let alone more than once.

It means that to get eight pages added last night I had to write ten, and I hate wasting effort. I don't believe that just because you had to struggle to write it the story is automatically better; in fact it's more typical for me to decide that if I'm struggling to write the story I'm working too damned hard and it's better to leave the thing alone until it's not a struggle to write the thing.

This is a new thing for me: knowing the story I want to tell and how I want to tell it, but having trouble telling it that way. If I take an easier path, I ruin the story. It flames out fast, or it stops being interesting, or it gets too gritty. (Or combinations, or all three.)

And I'm not even sure it's going to be worth telling. I don't know if people will like it.

Well, the important thing is for me to keep punching and getting pages written. I can keep the thing out of the weeds; it's just taking more herding than is typical for me. I have a feeling that it's going to be well worth the effort, regardless of how other people receive it.

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