And nothing happens still...until I go to a "warm body" cattle call, basically doing a job they haven't figured out how yet to automate, so they need someone who can read and move under his own power and pass a drug test. A temporary, holiday position, working as a temp in an Amazon ditribution center. Depressed that this is the best I can find, I prepare to accept the job.
And suddenly, there's a tech temp agency working hard to get me a job, and a scant couple of weeks later I have a job, a technical job. The offer was extended, and accepted, Thursday morning.
And then, just a few hours ago on Friday evening, I get this from Amazon itself--not the temp agency but the actual corporation--regarding an application I submitted more than a month ago:
We're excited to make a contingent offer to you for the Full-Time Warehouse Associate position at our [not Fungal Vale] facility!I just have to do that thing where you look down, shake your head, and laugh to yourself.
This offer is contingent upon completing and successfully passing the required background check and other pre-employment requirements which may include a drug screen.
[Some details redacted.]
If you are currently working, do not leave your position until you receive a confirmation that all of your contingencies (drug screen and background check) have cleared and you are ready to attend New Hire Orientation. In some circumstances, the invitation to attend New Hire Orientation or the completion of your contingencies may be delayed.
Your offer is waiting. To accept this offer, please complete these next steps:
My reluctance to accept the temp agency offer for that exact job was based on two things: 1) "holiday help" meaning you're out the door as soon as they decide they no longer need you, and 2) my current employer was just starting to tell me they might be able to get me into a phone support job. If Amazon had come through with this offer for a full-time permanent position a week after I applied for that job--instead of waiting what, six weeks?--I'd already be working there.
From February through October my job hunt went so poorly my wife thought I was shining her on, only saying that I was sending out resumes. "You ought to be getting some hits," she'd say incredulously. "I know!" I'd reply. "I have no frickin' clue what the problem is."
But my entire career has worked this way. When it's time for me to have a job, I get one, and there is absolutely nothing I can do that has any effect on that. (Other than sending out resumes. Even if it's time for me to get a job, I won't get one if I don't look for one.) If it's not time yet, I can put in applications like a maniac and absolutely nothing will happen. Once it is, well--this is what happens.
I thought it would happen a month earlier, in October. I was wrong--but that's good, because it means I'm doing something technical instead of pure customer service or warehouse/logistics stuff. As I'd hoped for, and given up hoping for.
Should have just had faith and remembered this is how it works for me.