See, I had been bemoaning the fact that Preparation H is no longer available with benzocaine in it, at least in the US. This evening I was chatting with him on Faceboob. He was talking about how you can still get "leaded" Preparation H north of the border, up in Canukistan, and how "millions of gallons" of it come south even though only about 2% of it is used for its original intended purpose. The rest? $2 face lifts etc.
That's when it hit me: there are products out there with lidocaine in them. Over the counter products, stuff you can buy without a prescription, which I could apply to the "affected area" and which would make the hurting stop.
I was not too polite; I didn't even close the chat--I ran out to Jewel and bought some.
And a tiny little dab of it later, I'm pain-free for the first time since Thursday afternoon. It's night and day. Swelling bleeding etc is still present but I CAN SIT DOWN without it hurting!
This is going to help a lot tomorrow, let me tell you.
I mean, this is the third day that I've been cudgeling my brain trying to figure out a way to alleviate the pain and suffering, and it wasn't until I was talking to him that I realized what I needed to do. Thanks, Og!