atomic_fungus (atomic_fungus) wrote,

#680: Headlines and Spam!

Headlines first.

Gun control! "An Ottawa teen believes cops were too quick to pull the trigger on a mischief investigation that involved shaping his hand into a gun and yelling bang in a mock gunfight."

Next up, a nationwide ban on "Hide and Seek".

Only in California. "Would you like your eleven-year-old to be encouraged to cross-dress?" "Cross dressing day" in a junior high school. WTF. And it wasn't considered "news". Wow.

Who benefits from vote fraud? My guess is the guys who want to make it as easy as possible for people to commit vote fraud. Hint: they are not the Republicans.

Let Rachel Carson turn over in her grave--assuming she's dead, which I don't even know. Bring back DDT damn it! It's the single most effective anti-malaria measure known to Man!

* * *

And now, spam!

Chrystal Elder omits a critical verb. I hope "hard as a rock" is a metaphor, anyway, because no one likes a stone penis. (Except maybe ancient Greek sculptors.)

Marcos Munoz informs us that he supports the Minutemen! Good for you, Marcos!

barr deborah spins a psychadelic web of strangeness into my in box. What does a cocktail party wear, I wonder?

Garry Knight suggests that I can "masterclass" with more panache than I currently do. Is "masterclass" a verb? Maybe it's one of those new "outcome based" verbs like "to parent", and "to partner". (eg "I will partner with his teacher in order to parent him better. I will do my best to masterclass my parenting.")

Reyna Shirley says that "Sex after 45 is not a dream." Do I have to wait that long? 'Cause it's sure a dream right now, damn it. But I give Reyna points for constructing a complete and coherent sentence. She's done better than about 90% of the spammers out there just by doing that much. Clearly she is one of the best.

Susana Stacy informs me that there is big news a'comin'. I can't wait! What will the big news be? Will it be interesting and fun?

I hope the big news is worth waiting for.

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