atomic_fungus (atomic_fungus) wrote,

#7065: I seem to have caught a mild cold

Oh no it's the coronavirus I'd better self-quarantine myself for a month. *rolleyes* I've had the Barry White voice for a couple of days and today there's a little soreness. Otherwise, I feel fine. It's NOT COVID-19 but it could easily be a coronoavirus since they are a common cause of upper respiratory infections. (Though--wouldn't it be funny if it were COVID-19?)

Meanwhile this seems to have disappeared without so much as a trace and not even anyone on my side of the aisle has taken up the DEMOCRATS WANT AMERICANS TO GET SICK spin that I expected.

And so yesterday our fat-ass tax-dodging governor declared that all schools in Illinoistan will be closed until the end of March. Except they'll remain open so kids can get their federally-funded school lunches, because of course parents have no fucking clue how to feed lunch to their children or anything, and it's not like having a bunch of kids congregate at the school to get lunch doesn't render completely moot the reason for closing the schools in the first place. "We're closing the schools to slow down the rate of transmission! But we're still allowing the kids to come to school for lunches!" *rolleyes*

Also, the Illinoistan Gaming Commission decided that it's vital that the casinos be closed for the rest of the month, to prevent transmission of the virus. This move is so important for public health that on Friday they made the decision to close the casinos TWO DAYS LATER, ON SUNDAY NIGHT.

Look, I get it: we need to reduce the rate of transmission, and the way to do that is to keep people from congregating in large numbers. But if it's such an emergency that these places must be closed, they ought to be closed RIGHT NOW and closed completely. Not two days later, not left open for certain functions.

It's almost as if certain factions of our government want to make this thing as bad as possible.

I haven't been to the store since Wednesday but I'm willing to bet that when I do go later today it's going to be a total shitshow. I want a loaf of bread (will buy two if possible) and a jar of peanut butter, and I want to get some more Pepsi and Dew. Might pick up a few more pounds of ground beef and chicken breasts.

But I'm not going to fill my cart with stuff. If this thing blows up, we're looking at three to five weeks stuck at home, more likely 3. I have enough supplies on hand to keep us fed that long, not necessarily in the most varied and flavorful fashion, but fed nonetheless. I might grab some yeast and another bag of flour--for the bread machine in case we get stuck.

As usual, I am planning for a moderate situation: we get quarantined at home for three weeks. (My wife says, "We're gonna get corona'ed!") We get quarantined, but delivery service is still available (if slow) so I can order stuff from Amazon and have it dropped on the front porch. No problem. I'm going out later today to pick up my pills; I'll get a pack of razor refills at the same time.

* * *

And I'll go to Menard's and get some kind of fencing material to block off the jonquil patch so the mail delivery person doesn't keep walking on them. That ticks me off. Use the driveway, you idiot!

* * *

This doesn't surprise me. I kind of figured that China was making a move on the Philippines. Duterte's anti-US rhetoric was my main clue; China's had a strong presence in the Philippines for quite a while and that country can't survive economically without some kind of patron to support it.

To be honest, I don't know if keeping military bases there is worth the expense. I do know that hitching their cart to the China team of horses may not work out as well for the Philippines as they expect, in the long run.

* * *

Gee, another Democrat quite literally getting a "get out of jail free" card. Gee, another Democrat man who is married to a woman yet was found in a hotel room, incoherently drunk, with a male prostitute and a supply of illegal narcotics. Gee, another Democrat who doesn't get charged with "possession".


* * *

The Beavis and Butthead memes are going. "We should call it the 'Cornholio virus'," goes one, "since everyone wants TP for his bunghole."


* * *

Oh, and with that, pictures of a clown peeking out of a storm drain: "DOWN HERE, WE ALL HAVE TOILET PAPER!"

* * *

Woke up this morning with a burning question in my mind: "What is the male equivalent of the 'three sizes' question?"

Okay, in manga and anime sometimes a cheeky student will ask the hot new female teacher what her three sizes are (bust, waist, hips). Usually a guy, but there are circumstances where a girl will ask the question. But there is no equivalent for a male teacher being asked that question, as far as I know.

In my still-half-asleep state I concluded that length, diameter, and circumference--erect--was probably the answer. And the worst part of all that was, I knew that if this thing took off, it was going to be both girls and boys asking the question because yaoi (or "boys' love") manga exists and it's fucking horrible to contemplate.

I had decided that the world was not ready for this new and terrifying invention, and so I'd forget all about it and just go back to sleep--but the cat jumped on me and woke me out of whatever twilight state I was in that had connected me to this horrible dimension (pun intended).

With full consciousness came perspective: NO ONE CARES. And I alone survived to tell the tale.

* * *

Chalk that one up to "how my manga and anime addiction ruined my life", I suppose.

* * *

Anyway: Saturday, a few errands to run, nothing major; I'm only awake right now because of that bit about "three sizes", the cat, a very pressing need to urinate, and then desire for some food. With all of that attended to, I do believe I'll go back to bed and catch a few more winks.

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