atomic_fungus (atomic_fungus) wrote,

#7225: How many cylinders, and how much displacement, does COVID-19 have?

I ask that because a man who died of injuries sustained in a motorcycle crash was labeled a COVID-19 death. When asked about it, a state official said, " could actually argue that it could have been the COVID-19 that caused him to crash."

What, because he was rolling along, minding his own business, when SUDDENLY OUT OF NOWHERE, WILD COVID-19 ATTACKS! Seriously?

Oh, no, I get it! The guy was so worried about dying of COVID-19 that he decided he'd kill himself in a motorcycle crash instead. Right? "You won't get me, evil virus! Ha!" *smash*

No, that seems implausible, now that I think about it.

He was sick with the thing, see, and then he sneezed--no.

Was asymptomatic but suffered sudden respiratory arrest...? "I...I can't breathe!" *wreck*

In the movie Yellowbeard, Madeline Khan tries to explain to Royal Navy officer Eric Idle why her tavern is full of dead bodies.

"Plague!" She says.

Eric Idle throws down his gloves. "Plague?"

"Yeah! It came on--all, sudden, like!"

I think that's what happened here.

I can see it: the dude is on his bike, enjoying the weather and the wonderful feeling of riding a motorcycle, just rolling along, and suddenly--

Guy: "Strewth!"


Medical examiner: (gravely) "Yes. This is definitely the work of COVID-19."

* * *

I would have liked to have included the relevant scene from the Monty Python sketch which features John Cleese as Mozart, introducing various deaths of famous historical figures, but I can't seem to find it.

It begins with this, does not include the throat singing:

Anyway at the end there's a scene where Graham Chapman is sitting in a chair reading the paper, and suddenly he looks at the camera, says, "Strewth!", and dies.

* * *

...but no, all kidding aside I am pretty sure the guy didn't die of COVID-19, and this is why I don't trust the government numbers.

We're seeing huge spikes in the number of cases because we are testing LIKE CRAZY. Thirty-six million tests done since the beginning of this nonsense--that's 11% of the US population--and an astounding six hundred and fifty thousand tests PER DAY being done now.

I knew we were testing a lot; I didn't know it was 0.2% of the country's population every day. With over eleven percent of the population tested, deaths per week are declining.

July's figures peak at 700 people per week, but that's because the number of deaths is not counted continuously; it has to wait for reports and collation and-and-and. If you average the thing, the figure for July is maybe 500 a week, probably closer to 450, with an ever-expanding number of cases found because we're looking for them so hard.

The thing is over. It's been over. But the Democrats find it politically useful, so they're trying to make it as bad as they possibly can in order to get rid of Trump.

They'll use the surge in new cases to justify another lockdown. Count on it.

The lockdown was originally justified to "flatten the curve" but the vast surplus of intensive care beds turned out not to be needed, because the rate of severe illness was vastly overstated; and the news coming out of countries like Japan and Sweden show that the lockdown wasn't necessary in the first place, that it all could be handled with social distancing and frequent hand-washing.

* * *

I've said it before and I'll say it again: not just "no" but "fuck no". I will not use biometric anything. Not for ID, not for shopping, not for medical records, not for convenience, not for anything.

Mastercard likes the idea of a cashless society because they get a cut of every last cashless transaction that takes place. I'm not kidding; Mastercard clears something like 90% of all cashless transactions through its systems. Do you know how many transactions take place in the US every day? If they could get just one cent from every one of those transactions--

And the makers of vaccines? Wouldn't it be grand for them, if you could be denied service at a restaurant or a store or a gas station because you didn't get the latest flu shot?

And our would-be masters in government--everywhere you go, you could be tracked. Not just by where you spent money, either. The range on an RF tag is good enough that you could walk through a doorway and never know your tag had been scanned. Someone with the right kind of antenna could scan your tag from a distance, as long as they had a general idea of where to point the thing.

As I've said: as soon as you let them put a serial number on your body, as soon as their brand is on (or in) your flesh, you're their slave. Oh, it probably doesn't feel like that, at least not at first; at first you'll marvel at how convenient it is, not having to carry cash or credit cards or anything, just stick your hand in the scanner and tap out your PIN. Being able to check in at the doctor's office by sticking your hand in the scanner. Never having to give a policeman your driver's license because it's in your implant.

Later, though: not being able to go to the grocery store because you missed the window for your flu shot, and now you have to go get it at the special clinic down in the ghetto where the people without implants go. But your car won't start because missing a vaccination violates the terms of service for your car; but it also suspends your driver's license and the car knows that, too.

Get a friend to give you a ride? But you're under a suspension for not being vaccinated, and neither you nor your friend are wearing masks (because you're not sick) and when the police are alerted that an unvaccinated individual is being transported along regulated roadways by someone who isn't a properly-trained and -equipped medical transportation specialist--understand that "this is a free country" and they can't actually arrest and fine you, but you do end up being penalized on your "social credit" score.

Now having been labeled as socially irresponsible, you now pay more for everything and it's harder for you to find a job with that black mark against you. And you do need to find a new job because your now-former employer's HR department was informed of your newly-lowered social credit score, and "We only employ people who score above the median" or whatever the limit is.

...and so one rainy evening, you find yourself sitting under a highway overpass. I offer you my spare blanket and some of my soup.

It's going to be a long night, brother.

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