atomic_fungus (atomic_fungus) wrote,
atomic_fungus
atomic_fungus

#762: Spamologia part 39491293958189230590891



Dr. Felix Savage says that right now I need not dream about increasing the size of my male machine. However he apparently does not guarantee that my hopes can be realized at a later time. Apparently the magic will go away if I fail to act now.

Kirby Santos wants to recoginize me. I don't even know what that is. "Human!" Droned the alien robot. "You will be recoginized! Assume the position!"

...assuming he meant "recognized", why do I have to "clickthrough" for my recognition? That's totally unfair.

VIP offers me a choice. If I become a VIP I can be either a king or a queen!

I'd be a king. I'm too heterosexual to be a queen.

The entire city of Las Vegas is inviting me to gamble. I'd go, except I'm not the kind of person who can relax and have fun when there's money at stake. That's why I don't gamble; I don't think it's any fun.

* * *

Yes, only four today, out of 23.

Most of it was advertisements for counterfiet "replica" designer watches, none of which I want. I like "simple"; I do not like "bling". I don't like jewelry, nor do I really care about what label is on my clothing.

But if I were to get a designer whatsit, it would be a real whatsit, not some crappy-ass fake.

The "male enhancement" spam is also getting tedious. Who the hell is going to say, "You know, I've been thinking about talking to my doctor about a prescription for Viagra--but this guy who I have never heard of, and who is using a fake e-mail address, says he can sell me Viagra at a fraction of what anyone else can sell it for! I don't suspect it's just lumps of baking soda that look like Viagra tablets, or anything like that; I'm sure that it's real Viagra! I'll buy it from him because it costs so much less than it does from the pharmacy!"

If there were only some way I could send a return e-mail that would stab the actual spammer in the face, one time for each spam e-mail he had ever sent, it would make the world a much better place. If slightly messier in some spots.

No court in the world could convict me.
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