December 3rd, 2007

#748: Goddamn flu

I am sicker than the proverbial dog. I am sicker than two of them.

Everything was fine until Sunday afternoon, at which point I began to shit like a broken fire hydrant. In seven hours I dehydrated to the point of fainting--even though I kept taking liquids; they were just going right through, not passing "Go", not collecting $200, etc. Imodium did nothing.

Around 9:20 I went to the bathroom yet again, started feeling woozy, and the next thing I knew I was picking myself up off the vanity. I cleaned up, crawled out of the bathroom, and asked Mom to call 911.

At the ER they ran a few tests, pumped two liters of saline in, and sent me home. I got home around 1 AM with two jugs of Gatorade and a monstrous headache, which is still with me, but muted enough that the idea of sitting at the computer is no longer utterly unthinkable.

I have never been that dehydrated before. When I got ultra-sick at the end of my trip to Florida in 2002 I never felt like I was going to faint. Of course I had been slugging back Gatorade and Powerade almost continuously, and I didn't do that today because we didn't have any--so I drank plain water.

And as I said I'm not sure Gatorade would have done anything; if it doesn't stay in your system long enough for the body to absorb it, how does the actual composition of what you drink matter?

Just another example of what it's like to be me: it's another action-filled adventure!

#750: Those Venezuelans are so cute!

...they think that they get to tell Hugo Chavez he can't be el Presidente for life! They had a referendum recently on changing Venezuela's constitution, and they said "no" to the issue of letting someone be President as long as he can win elections, and they think that settles the matter.

There is something about such naivete which really tugs at the old heartstrings.

Come 2012, when Chavez "has" to leave office, does anyone seriously expect he will? This guy probably has a Fathead image of Castro on his bedroom ceiling, for Christ's sake. Castro for damn sure has never lost an election.

Rather than use the bloody violent revolution method of seizing power, as his role model did, Chavez instead used the Adolf Hitler "win an election, once" technique: get in and then change the rules so that you can't be deposed. This latest issue with the referendum is a minor hiccough and I do not expect Chavez to take this lying down.

* * *

Speaking of the power-mad, Hillary has just polled, in Iowa, behind Osama-Obama. (Thanks to Senator Edward Kennedy, whose slip of the tongue made that nickname for the junior senator from Illnois.) Do not expect Hillary to take this lying down. She's already said she'll attack other Democrats (surprise coefficient: 0.00...0) and she supposedly has some dirt on Obama.

It will be interesting to see how things go. This time four years ago, Dean was the odds-on favorite; but all that evaporated on one snowy Iowa day as Kerry got the nod from Iowa. Kerry was seen as "more electable" than Dean was. (Dean then did the now-famous "Dean Scream" which cemented his marginalization.) Will there be a "Hillary Scream"? That would be awesome.

Most Democrats have to know that Hillary is going to be a really tough sell. (I mean, "sell ice to eskimos" tough.) Whatever they may think of that--"the people out there in flyover country are too stupid or crazy or whatever to understand why Hillary Must Be President!"--they know it's going to be like giving cough syrup to a four-year-old.

I fully expect Hillary's machine to attempt to destroy anyone who gets a leg up on her--maybe not now, but once the primaries start.

Just as an example: this recent flap with the guy who took hostages at one of her campaign headquarters--if it had been any other candidate I would have taken it at face value. But since it was Hillary, there is a little bit of doubt in the back of my mind, and I am thinking that it just might be a publicity stunt.

* * *

As for me, the sinister illness continues. Imodium works now, though I have to keep taking it--and I've been eating soup and drinking Gatorade. And sleeping a lot. Which is what I'm going to do now. Later.