July 7th, 2008

#1154: Boy, is it ever Monday.

And not only is it Monday, it's a Monday with little news that inspires any kind of commentary from me.

And I haven't got anything to talk about, either, since I already told the story of the amazing--


Last night at work I saw something incredibly stupid; it's a gift card.

The Amazing Cake Man!


The Amazing Cake Man!

TACM is a Target gift card, and the card it's attached to bills Cake Man as "king of the candle holders". Flip a switch on his back, press his head, and he plays "Happy Birthday to You". (Melody only. And a bit flat.)

I laughed my ass off. And the coworkers who I showed TACM to also laughed their asses off. O Lord was it stupid.

And just as an aside, proving that there is an Internet forum for everything, we have the Target section of the gift card collectors forum.

I bet I could be really popular if I logged in there and said, "Hi, I'm a Target employee!..." except that I--while I may be pathetic--am not that pathetic.

Apparently the bar for being "king of the candle holders" is pretty low, since Cake Man can hold a maximum of two birthday candles. Two. While playing a monophonic "happy birthday" and sitting in frosting.

The feet don't even attach to Cake Man. You stick him in the frosting and put the feet in front of him.

If anything, Cake Man is the king of the moronic gift cards. Jesus.