July 17th, 2008

#1178: The funny side of the story.

Skydiver with prosthetic leg goes skydiving. Leg falls off.

Now imagine this scene:

It's a pleasant day, and Mr. and Mrs. Smith are barbequing in the backyard. The kids are splashing in the pool, the dog is lazing in the shade, and all is well.


Mrs: Honey, what was that?
Mr: Eh? I don't know, it...OH MY GOD IT'S A LEG!
Mrs: A leg?
Mr: ...oh, it's a fake leg. A prosthetic leg. (looks up) Where the hell did it come from?
Jr: Wow, cool! An artificial leg! Can we keep it?
Dog: (at leg) Woof! Woof! Woof!

...This is goddamned funny.

* * *

PROVEN! Hot Wheels radar gun sets off radar detectors! Awesome! Fricking awesome!

* * *

"I didn't know I'd go to jail for freedom of speech." No? Most people are smart enough to know that if you are in court and you call the sitting judge an "asshole", you are probably not doing yourself any favors. "Freedom of speech" has several constitutional limitations, and one of them is that you don't get to insult a sitting judge.

* * *

Ann Coulter. "What we really need is a car that runs on Democrats' lies." O I love her.

* * *

Step 1: Bush rescinds executive order banning offshore drilling.
Step 2: Oil prices fall $10 per barrel in the following 2 days.


Step 4: Profit!

* * *

Og on the New Yorker cover fiasco. I think he sums the issue up rather neatly. Og's smarter than he lets on.

* * *

It was a beastly hot night at the store. I'm glad I don't work tonight. I drove all the way home with the AC on, and immediately got into the shower when I arrived.

The massively incorrect weather station in Crete is reporting that it's 101° outside already, but it's not. It's closer to 80°. It regardless is on the way to being a hot freaking day; and the most strenuous thing I have planned for outside this house is maybe going out for Chinese food later on. Maybe.

* * *

Two morons now look even more stupid after attempting to rob a woman with BB guns. The woman in question had some big strong men as friends. (Don't they always?) The two morons got their shit handed to them, in detail.

They're lucky the young woman didn't own a handgun. They might have ended up in the morgue instead. If I have a handgun, and you come after me with a weapon that looks like a lethal weapon, I will shoot your ass even if it is actually a BB gun you're holding. I'm nearsighted.

* * *

Barak Hussein Obama, who originally said he would negotiate with Iran without any preconditions, now wishes to prevent nuclear proliferation. He says he wants to rid the world of nuclear weapons.

Go back to the Ann Coulter article. This is another "...and then a miracle occurs!" situation.

Step 1: Barak Hussein Obama is elected president.
Step 2: Barak Hussein Obama is inaugurated.
Step 4: Utopia!

Um, no.

* * *

With the latest tankful of gas, I got 36.17 MPG in the red Escort. This is only 9 MPG less than the real-world economy of a Toyota Prius.

* * *

Today's time waster: EvilMadScientist.com. Lord o' mercy, there's a lot of interesting stuff on that site.

#1179: Scientists behaving like...SCIENTISTS? OMG!

The American Physical Society is actually going to debate the theory that global warming is the result of human carbon dioxide emissions.

We'll see how well this goes.

* * *

Some NASA engineers take a step in the right direction. NASA of course wants an all-new system, not something built from off-the-shelf hardware, but these "mavericks" are at least thinking the right way.

Their idea is "Jupiter", a booster built from Shuttle hardware. (Not as good as "Saturn", IMHO, damn it.) The Jupiter concept relies on liquid-fueled boosters--Space Shuttle Main Engines fed from a Space Shuttle fuel tank--where Ares relies heavily on SRBs (Solid Rocket Boosters). To put it mildly, Ares has, shall we say, vibration and oscillation issues; the Shuttle booster hardware, at least, is already man-rated and proven.

The mavericks suggest that NASA could save about $25 billion over two decades if they went this route. (Probably more as Ares overruns begin to mount. And mount they will. It's a government program.) That's something like 14% of their current annual budget.

Now, here's a great premise for a near-term SF story: a company decides to use the "Jupiter" plan and builds boosters using Shuttle hardware.

* * *

Students building satellites. Quoth the article:
"Engineering students also gave the aerospace industry low ratings for its physical work facilities, exciting and meaningful tasks, opportunities for professional development and growth, and supporting and encouraging management."
Yeah, I can second that opinion, from personal experience. Working--in 2000!--in an office with evil 1970s' orange furniture, believe me...on the service manual for a GPS receiver.

After 2000, Rockwell-Collins failed every last one of those categories. Facilities: sucked. Tasks: sucked. Professional development: sucked. Management: S-U-C-K-E-D.

Before 2001, only the first one was a "fail"; everything else was awesome.

* * *

The often-wrong weather station said the high temperature for today was 108°F. I can't categorically deny the possibility that it has been that hot here since we started recording temperatures, but God knows when that was. It certainly was not anything like that hot today.

* * *

Price of color laser printer, with toner: $300
Price of toner refill for color laser printer: $330


Should you just buy a new printer when you run out of toner? That's what I'd do. Screw it.

"Color Laser Toner! Now with FREE printer!"

* * *

Since reading 17 chapters of the Doujin Work manga, I feel like watching it again.

* * *

You've got to be kidding me. The first part of this post is a true "WTF". O Lord. I don't blame that guy one bit for his reaction.

I think I would have just laughed at him.