April 28th, 2012

#3330: One quick post before I start getting ready for today's performance.

TSA follies:

Weer'd writes about Minneapolis-St. Paul airport being shut down because TSA thought they'd found a bomb in a guy's checked luggage.

The "bomb" was a water filtration system--a granular substance in PVC tubes--and though there were wires they weren't connected to anything.

The best part: the TSA geniuses evacuated the terminal except for the people who had already been cleared through the security checkpoint.

"Yeah, we think there's a bomb so we're evacuating the airport, rxcept for the people who are inside the security perimeter." I guess the people inside the perimeter were expendable?

Look: if you really think you've got a bomb inside the airport you evacuate everybody. If you don't think you've got a bomb inside the airport you don't evacuate anybody.

What the hell is this shit, then? I'll tell you what it is: the TSA goons were pretty sure it wasn't a bomb and didn't want to have to re-screen the whole fucking airport when it was time to let the people back in. That's it, and that's all it is.

The TSA needs to show that it's on top of security, you know, so when anything shows up that even kinda-sorta looks like it might be something resembling a bomb they go all-out on the security schtick.

But of course if they had evacuated the entire airport, then planes would be delayed and thousands of people would be inconvenienced and there'd be a huge bottleneck at the security checkpoint while their screeners re-screened everyone that had been removed from the councourses, and the headlines would have read "water filtration system delays thousands".

The air travel system in this country is very tightly linked and scheduled. A delay of a flight at one airport can screw up the complex ballet of aircraft and passengers and cost millions of dollars. TSA knows this, and the example of (oh, whatever airport it was that kicked out TSA and hired a private security firm) is demonstrating that airlines don't need TSA.

If enough airlines complain about the TSA goons delaying their flights, the airports will decide to eschew TSA and go with private security...and then TSA loses its bailiwick.

TSA isn't about security. It's not going to stop the next major terror attack on US soil. It's also a perfect example of how government cannot do anything correctly.


Also: Newark's air terminal evacuated over potential baby-bomb. Mom and baby go through the metal detector and set it off. Mom hands baby off to dad and goes through again, no beep.

TSA goons belatedly realize they didn't re-screen the baby, so they evacuated the terminal.

...a huge explosion destroyed five airplanes and killed about a thousand people, and it took six fire departments to put out the fire. It was feared that the fire could spread to the nearby tank farm, but disaster was averted.

It could have been so much worse without the TSA bravely evacuating the--eh?


Apparently the TSA couldn't find the family in question, and by the time they gave up the search they figured that whatever plane the family had been headed for was already airborne.



Apparently, nothing happened.

Gee, who could have predicted that?

* * *

This is a Gizmodo page but a couple of dickheads apparently watched Southern Comfort one too many times and tried rigging a popular hiking trail with "medieval" booby traps.

There are LOLmugshots of the two idiots. The guy on the left looks like a total fucktard without his "gauges" in his earlobes. Sometimes I think "gauges" should be considered "justifiable homicide": "Just getting your ears pierced is for posers, man. If you really wanna be cool you got to be able to pass a fuckin' Coke bottle through your earlobe! And I'm almost halfway there, dude!"

On the plus side, when that dickhead is in his fifties and needs false teeth, he can get one of those chain things. Hook one end to his sadly distended earlobe and the other to his teeth, so he always knows where his teeth are.

His buddy looks more-or-less normal but for the vacant smile: "Oh, wow, man, I got arrested."


* * *

It's a bit long, but interesting reading on how the cultural elite killed culture because it was getting too accessible to the common man.

So that explains why modern "art" is shit. The common man has common sense and isn't going to think that paint splattered randomly on canvas is art, but the elites can convince themselves that it's an amazing reduction of artistic vision to basic elements which can be interpreted hatstand fishtank teapot stoatweasel. Yeah.

And if you think it's just random drizzles of pigment, why, that indicates that you're not sophisticated and nuanced and intelligent enough to understand high art.

...apparently these people never heard that old story, "The Emperor's New Clothes". What they are doing is not exactly a new phenomenon.

* * *

Behind-the-scenes images from the good Star Wars movies.

The second picture has got to be a test shot, because there's nothing behind the Milennium Falcon's cockpit to indicate the gangway from the hold or anything. And since that was from the late 1970s they were not going to composite in something with the computer later on; the blue stuff surrounding the set was for the optical printer that would patch in the starfield (or whatever) later on.

Besides, it looks like there aren't even control consoles in front of Han and Chewbacca.

...their feet sticking out of the bottom, that I don't find surprising in the least. If there will never be a live-action shot that shows the bottom of the cockpit section of the ship, no one will build it; there's no point.

Oh, wait: it looks as if the cockpit door is closed--so maybe it isn't a test shot after all. Maybe it's the set used for closeups of the actors in the cockpit, then, which is why there are no consoles in front of the actors.

Well, I suppose it doesn't matter.

* * *

And now, I must get my ass in gear.

Yeah. Break a leg, me!

#3331: I survived the first performance.

I kind of mangled one line, but it wasn't too horribly mangled. The expedient of having my script with me (in the "Dino Denims" binder I put together) helped.

While the kids are singing their songs, I pretend to write in it, and do a "frustrated businessman with no time to do anything" schtick. I pretend to send text messages on my phone, etc.

...the audience's eyes are all on the kids, anyway, because that's who they're there to see. I could sit there with a glazed look on my face and people would be just as happy.


I do, now, find myself reconsidering my "NEVER AGAIN!" stance of the other night, though. Half of the reason I'm having the trouble that I'm having comes from my own near-total lack of experience: I mean, the last time I was in a stage production of any kind was 1979--and in that one I only had one line.

Another good fraction comes out of the fact that I've only rehearsed for a couple weeks. When was my first rehearsal, the 10th? Oh, no--it was the 14th, that's right. So it has, in fact, only been a couple of weeks.

The kids have been rehearsing every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday since March 20. I asked the director to tell me when she wanted me to start coming to rehearsals, because--as she said--they were going to start only with the kids, the songs, and the dance moves, and concentrate on that alone for the first couple weeks.

If I do one of these again, I'm going to go to every damn rehearsal, because two weeks isn't enough time for me to crowbar this stuff into my cranium such that I can regurgitate it properly on cue.


Anyway, I got a couple of compliments from adults in the audience while I was waiting in line for a couple of cookies and a cup of fruit punch. So that's fine.

One down, one to go...and then I can really relax.