atomic_fungus (atomic_fungus) wrote,
atomic_fungus
atomic_fungus

#881: There's no real news worth mentioning, but there's SPAM!

I don't know what to make of this e-mail from Donovan J. Callahan titled "Don't you agree to be sick!" So many people think that you can put a "!" at the end of an interrogative in order to emphasize it, I think he might be asking me if I agree to be sick. The answer to that question is "no, I don't agree to be sick."

As far as I know, a person can't agree or disagree with becoming ill. Your body gets invaded by a pathogen, your immune system kicks into gear, and you get sick while your body fights off the invader. (Most of the symptoms of the "common cold" come from the immune response, not the pathogen itself.) So regardless of whether you like it or not, you don't have much of a choice--if you get sick, you get sick.

Is he asking permission? Is that it? "Don't you agree to be sick?" What kind of "sick"? I'm nursing a mild cold at the moment; will that do? Or does he mean psychiatrically? Is he asking me to voluntarily undertake a "lifestyle change" that will make me insane or weird? (Okay, weirder than I already am?)

Now, if it's meant to be an imperative statement, it makes a bit more sense. But it would have been better if he'd said, "Don't let yourself get sick!" Either way, of course, we've gone beyond sage advice and into "I am Captain Obvious!" territory.

So I've decided that this guy is a moron.

joseph Hindmarch "You will leave the women begging for more once you reap the benefits of a larger..."

Let me just finish his sentence, first. "You will leave the women begging for more once you reap the benefits of a larger WALLET." It's pretty much a given that the rich guys get more chicks than the poor ones do. This is obviously some kind of veiled investement spam.

Clifford Hamilton "Your new schlong will win more prizes!"

...

PRIZES??

* * *

McCain got the nod in Illinois--big surprise--as did Obama. Big surprise. Whee.

*

The 6-8 inches of snow we were supposed to get last night failed to materialize. Instead it dripped rain all night, and only now has it begun to snow. Snowfall estimates for the area have been revised downward accordingly.

The real problem I have with the weather of late is this up-down-up-down thing the temperatures have been doing. It's led me to get a freaking cold. As far as I can tell, no one around me has had a cold. How long does it take one to incubate? I was exposed to one woman at work who had a cold, like two weeks ago; Monday night, then, maybe 12 days after I was exposed to her cold, then I get a bit of a scratchy throat. WTF.

I thought viruses and stuff bred fast. That's not fast.

In any case, I've been taking Zicam; even though it's a homeopathic remedy and there's no logical reason it should work, it does--at least, it has, for me, in the past. I don't quite understand that, but WTF, why question it? If it keeps me from having to miss a day of work, it's worth it.

I did brave the crappy weather last night to get some ice cream, though. My primary cure for the common cold involves orange juice (or, at least, vitamin C) and ice cream. In the latter case, take one dose 3x per day, preferably after meals. With the OJ, take as needed. It might not actually help matters any, but it can't hurt; you need fluids, and OJ is good for you, and the ice cream soothes the scratchy throat nicely, and it makes you mind not being sick quite so much.

And that's all for today. Later.
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