atomic_fungus (atomic_fungus) wrote,

#202: Gravion, Initial Thoughts

This morning I watched the first two episodes of Gravion, and it's not very good.

I really didn't expect much from it. I bought it mainly because I got it cheap; I paid something like $8 for the series of 13 episodes. "Cheap" is not my only criterion when buying anime but I figured that at $0.62 per episode, why not?

Gravion is a transforming-and-combining mech show. The genre goes rather far back; the first iteration of the type I ever saw was Gatchaman, edited, dubbed, and re-named Battle of the Planets for the American market.

My biggest complaint with the story, so far, is that none of the characters are very sympathetic; I'm just not interested in any of them. They have spent very little time--out of two episodes--introducing them to us.

Well, the Gravion--the big combined mech--is the real star of the show, anyway. The animation "bank" for the formation of the Gravion from its disparate parts is longer than most magical girl transformation sequences; in fact I think that Wedding Peach and her two friends could transform, then do their "oiro naoshi" into Fighter Angels, and have time for tea afterwards, while the Gravion was assembling itself.

The bad guys are a race of aliens named the Zeravire, and they are biomechanical evolving aliens. They attack Earth for unknown reasons with machines that Earth technology cannot touch. No one saw them coming except for Klein Sandman, the super-rich recluse who financed the construction of the Gravion and the recruitment and training of the people who can pilot it.

...the people who can pilot it have some special quality, without which the Gravion won't work--shades of Evangelion. And, come to think of it, the aliens are rather like the "Angels" from that series, too.

Partway through the second episode I started to get into it, at least a little; there is some entertainment value in the show as long as you don't expect much from it. Mech shows are not my favorite genre of anime, and the only one that ever really caught my attention was Gundam W.

This evening I got to thinking about Mizuki Tachibana, one of the characters in the series. Here is a picture of a faithfully-executed model of the character:

Yes, her breasts are individually larger than her head. That's what the character looks like in the actual anime, too. I got to thinking, what do those things weigh?

The specific gravity of fat is 0.93--water is 1.0, of course--so it should be relatively simple to calculate their actual weight. Of course, it seems to be virtually impossible to find a sample head volume on the internet; doing a search for a sample number--I just want to do a first-order approximation, damn it!--instead I get all kinds of useless junk. (Well, useless to me.)

Wikipedia says that a pair of D-cup breasts can weigh up to 23 pounds, and that's for a reasonable and realistic pair of breasts, not for Mizuki's. In fact her breasts are bigger than her head. So I can say with some reasonable confidence that Mizuki has at least a good forty pounds of BOOBS hanging off her chest.

Dolly Parton is a 40DD and she has back problems; she probably had 25 pounds of breasts before she had them surgically reduced. Mizuki--again, a first-order approximation puts her bust measurement somewhere around 72 inches, and I don't even know how to figure what cup size she would be.

According to this, she's well beyond a "G" cup. In fact, Mizuki would probably fall somewhere in multiple "Z" territory.

Good thing she's not real. Those things are just too fucking big.

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