atomic_fungus (atomic_fungus) wrote,

#2346: Damn, what a wonderful feeling that is.

When I woke up this morning, everything was normal...and then suddenly it was not normal; it was awesome. For a few minutes.

If you have ever--and everyone has--put your hand on, or held, a vibrating object for a long period of time, and then taken it away, you have felt a peculiar tingling sensation in that hand. You finish mowing the lawn with Old Reliable and step away from the thing; you take your hand off the gearshift after spending twenty minutes in stop-and-go traffic; you put down the sawzall to take a break from demolishing the bathroom--whatever. When the vibration stops, your hands still feel it for a little while.

My legs, below the knees, feel that way all the time. And they have since I was a teenager.

Only this morning, for a little while, they didn't.

It's something that's happened, from time to time, for decades. With decreasing frequency, occasionally I will be given an all-too-brief respite from the tingling and buzzing sensation in my shins. The sensation is part of the background noise of my existence; I notice it only when it stops.

But it's always there, and it's always factored into "how do I feel?" It's a continual drag on my energy level. It's not painful, not exactly, but it's a relief when it stops, however briefly.

Today I think it stopped for as much as three or four minutes, which is the longest period of relief I have ever had from this. It even lasted past me getting up; I went out to the car to hit McDonald's for breakfast and felt like dancing or running or skipping or all three or something. ("All three": that would have been an interesting sight. Someone would have called an ambulance: "That man is having a seizure!")

Now it's back. *sigh*

I always worry about being lazy, but I have to wonder how much of my motivation disappears into these physiological "black holes". Between the buzzing in my shins and the continuous sensations of symptomatic diverticulosis and IBS, I'm not usually in any real pain but these things certainly do sap my will to live.

Of course, since it's not pain, painkillers don't touch it. I have no idea why the sensation is there nor why it occasionally just goes away. And just try explaining it to a doctor.

In 1991 I started suffering from a weird malady: the little finger of my left hand felt numb, and I couldn't move it with much dexterity. I could wiggle the little finger on my right hand about 2-3 times a second, but the left one would only move once (or less) per second.

The doctors did all kinds of things. They did an MRI of my head, neck, and spine to see if there was something wrong in there. They checked the conduction of my nerves by sticking needles into them and looking at the results on an oscilloscope. They gave me these tiny blue pills which made me so spacy that one morning, I found myself at work and couldn't remember how I'd gotten there.

It was how I was sleeping: I was laying on my left side in such a way as to compress the ulnar nerve (the "funny bone") and that was why my little finger was behaving strangely. I changed how I slept, and presto! the weirdness disappeared almost entirely in one day and was gone in a week. I saw three doctors and had all kinds of medical imaging done and no one thought to ask me, "Hey, what position do you sleep in?"

Yeah. I wonder how many thousands of dollars' worth of tests the doctors would have to perform? And the final result would be to tell me, "We can't find anything wrong with you. Take these expensive pills."


* * *

The BATF is full of totalitarian pricks. The M1 Garand is an excellent semiauto carbine, but the BATF says it "poses a threat to public safety in the U.S."

Their theory is that the return of these rifles to the US would increase the supply, thus lowering the price, thus--y'know--enabling ordinary people to buy them. And the BATF doesn't like it when civilians can actually afford to own firearms.

This is even more fatuous:
The ATF also expressed concern that anyone who can purchase seven separate parts for the gun and install them correctly – or those individuals who can machine their own steel parts for guns – probably could convert the carbine into a machine gun.
Well, that describes every damn semiautomatic firearm out there! Whenever you have a semiautomatic gun, it doesn't take much work to convert it to full auto because 95% of "full auto" is the mechanism which ejects the spent casing, loads a fresh cartridge, and cocks the hammer. "Seven separate parts"? It takes seven to do it?

As I recall there was a case where BATF went after a guy whose semiauto handgun had a worn part; the gun had not been purposely converted to full auto but the wear of this part had resulted in the gun misbehaving. The BATF went after the guy for converting it into a machine gun.

God damn it, we need to get these assholes out of our civil rights.

* * *

STDs are an occupational hazard for porn actors. What can you say about it? Sure, everyone is tested, and smart producers make sure all their actors have current tests before anyone even takes his clothes off, but shit happens. Is it really worth it?

Somehow I doubt it.

* * *

Yes, economics even applies to sex.

* * *

Ace on the Democrat scheme to seize control of all retirement accounts in the US.

* * *

I could link a lot of these myself, but I won't. The first one, about congressional staffers making all kinds of money on insider trading, is typical of how government works: private citizens would go to jail for doing that.

* * *

Remember when Japan was going to take over the world? Now China occupies that position, and China is making the same mistakes Japan made, only bigger.

* * *

The inevitable result of eating a curry taco. (Totally safe for work. It's a picture of a billboard behind a statue.)

* * *

I finally finished reading ToraDora! and I approve of the story.

...the anime's treatment of the story flamed out somewhere near the end of it; they screwed up the ending. Both of the endings are the same, but the anime botched how it handled it.

Even so, I think I'm going to re-watch the anime.

* * *

So this guy was arrested for going on a shooting spree in Will County; and just now I heard that this guy was let go, all charges dropped, because he had extensive proof of alibi--cell calls, a receipt from a store, computer logs--and could not have committed the crimes of which he's accused.

WTF. How the hell is that not "false arrest", then? I don't understand this bullshit one whit. None of it makes any sense, which is why I believe the old adage, "The law is an ass."

* * *

Dang it, I put new wipers on the Escort in March, and they're already disintegrating. Disintegrating! The damn things are coming apart! I'll be going to the auto parts store and buying five wiper blades--two for the Escort and three for the Jeep. *sigh*

* * *

I've heard this Safelite commercial several times, and it bugs the crap out of me.

"My client had a carpool full of kids, when--"

What the hell do the goddamned kids have to do with gravel cracking the windshield? Am I supposed to stand up and scream OH MY GOD THOSE CHILDREN WERE ALMOST KILLED!!! or something? Is that supposed to convince me that I NEED TO CALL THEM RIGHT THE FUCK NOW BEFORE ALL MY KIDS DIE IN A DEAFENING EXPLOSION OF FLAMES AND HORROR?!!?!?!? (I don't even have kids.)

The service doesn't prevent window cracks; it merely repairs them. What a crock.

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