In the very drawer I searched some four times.
Which I even went so far as to clean out the other night, thoroughly.
They were in small envelopes CLEARLY MARKED "SAFE DEPOSIT KEY".
WHICH I HAD HANDLED SEVERAL TIMES.
My mother's father was in the Knights of Colombus and Mom was in the Eastern Star, and whenever they got a lodge pin or something similar it came in little tiny envelopes like those. I've seen plenty of the damn things; and every time I saw those little envelopes my brain said, "These are lodge pins: disregard."
...only they weren't lodge pins, and if I had taken ONE FREAKING SECOND to read the printing on the freaking envelopes, I would have had an inventory of the safe deposit boxes MONTHS ago.
Yeah, I'm a real frickin' genius, ain't I?