I slept until almost 3 PM. I'm not getting anything done like this, damn it.
...but when I woke up, nothing hurt. Stomach, arms, legs, head, back, nothing. I felt like I was floating on a cloud, I was so comfortable. I didn't feel sick or hypoglycemic or even mildly unhappy. I wanted to stay there and just drift along, being comfortable and not miserable, for as long as I could, but unfortunately hydraulic pressure forced me out of bed to hit the can.
I'm finding myself trying to balance Sleep while you can, because when the work starts, you've got to do well against You have shit to get done, anus! and I'm not managing to do the latter very well. It's annoying.
Og has been suffering in the grips of some sinister malady, and I have to wonder if I'm not doing the same in miniature, because I've felt pretty lousy since Sunday myself. But then again I've felt pretty lousy since December, so I didn't really notice anything out of the ordinary until after I took the Vicodin yesterday--and then the sudden cessation of misery made me realize just how bad I felt, both physically and emotionally.
So I don't know what to do, and there's this general feeling of "You're not getting anything done" which pervades all my thinking. It's fine to take a sick day when you're feeling shitty, but when you merely feel "not good" you're supposed to gut it up and do what needs doing.
But when "not good" goes on and on and on, for three months? What then?
* * *
On Sunday, while Og and I were discussing my impending employment at #2, he said, "I think I'm more excited about this than you are!"
I couldn't argue with the point; I've noticed that I'm approaching all of this with an air of dread, only because--I made the point while replying to his comment--it's hard to get excited at good news when every other time you've managed to get something to go your way, it's ended up being taken away from you a few months later.
You get used to waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I want to be happy and excited, but I'm not; I'd be happier and more excited if I'd received a firm offer rather than "Let's see how it goes for two weeks," because there's too much shit that can go wrong with a trial period like that. I'm not worried about how I'll do; but there's a lot of it that is beyond my control...and it's the stuff that's beyond my control that always (always) ends up being what gets me. I don't want to get all happy and excited only to have them tell me, "Well, this is all well and good, but...." and find myself unemployed again. Better to expect nothing while giving it my best shot; all I can do is all I can do.
There's too much uncertainty in the situation for my comfort. What can I do in two weeks? All I can really do is demonstrate a willingness to learn; I certainly can't jump in and start doing the work they're hiring me to do--except that everyone seems to understand that my job, for the first year or so, will entail learning how to do what they're paying me to do.
*sigh* There's also no point to analyzing it.
* * *
I don't get why they're planning to retire the Tevatron. I remember seeing some story somewhere about how the Tevatron was going to be retired, and I didn't--and don't--understand why.
Okay, the Tevatron can't hit energies like CERN's new toy can--so what? It's still useful; this kind of story proves it. They're still finding new things with it. A heretofore unsuspected particle doesn't mean that physics is wrong or anything, but the new data suggests that there's some wrinkle to particle physics we don't yet understand...and whenever you get a new piece of data, it helps to refine the model you use to describe how the world works.
And the more we know about how the world works, the better we get at doing intricate and interesting things. (For example, without an understanding of quantum physics, there'd be no semiconductors. And the smaller the feature sizes get, the better we need to understand quantum mechanics.)
* * *
Heinlein wrote about the "replicating pantograph" in some of his stories and I think the "3D printer" is pretty close to the kind of thing he was imagining.
Or might be, someday.
* * *
The world was coming to an end in 1967, the year I was born. It's always coming to an end.
Interesting note, though: Jim Jones was a socialist. The same Jim Jones whose cult gave us the "drinking the Kool-ade" meme. (They used "Flavor-ade" though.) I never knew the man was a socialist until today. Funny how none of the stories ever mention that.
* * *
Nice weather today; 50s for the rest of the week...and 79° on Sunday.
Why the hell is spring so short?
* * *
Watching anime last night I ended up with a couple of awesome pan cels--one of which is NSFW--and one which is marginal; but the latter is okay for American TV, so here:
Ep 31 of Fairy Tail managed to be (at least in part) an onsen episode, and Lucy spent a good chunk of the ep dressed like that.
The following is a screencap from a scene that made me weep bitter tears:
...I wept because we don't get to see what Lucy sees. Just thinking about it, I am choking back the tears again. Life is cruel.
Here is the a link to the NSFW pic, of Yui from ToLoveRu in the bathtub. Warning! Cartoon boobies! View at your own risk! You can be killed! ...etc.
* * *
"You can be killed":
Sometime in the late 1980s my brother finally convinced my Dad that we needed a serious TV antenna, and secured funding to buy one and install it in the attic. My brother eschewed affixing the warning label to it, so I took the label and stuck it on my lamp.
DANGER!...or something like that. The emphasis comes from the original. Anyway, my then-friend Keith saw this warning and lost it, and from then on it became a running joke in my circle of friends. "You can be KILLED!" ended up prompting Keith to look for other, similar warning labels, and such dire warnings ended up being an integral part of our communications.
Watch for wires!
You can be KILLED if this antenna contacts power lines!
I am kind of surprised that the movie we made in 1991, Captain Fantastic, was not chock-full of these in-jokes. We had more than a hundred of them (I made a list--145 to be exact) and only one or two of them made it into the movie.
Okay, some of them wouldn't work in a movie about a superhero; and some were quotes from movies--but that still leaves plenty that would have/should have been in it, and weren't.
"Trick arm", for example. I mean, there isn't any inside joke that defined that group better than "trick arm" did.
One evening in 1986 we were watching Remo Williams--The Adventure Begins and there's this scene where this guy with an artificial arm is being gnawed on by a doberman pinscher. The guy's artificial arm had been shown earlier in the movie, but we'd forgotten about it, and so this guy has a large dog hanging off his arm and is apparently in no pain whatsoever, and we're all kind of scoffing about it; and then I remembered:
"Hey!" I said. "He's biting him on the trick arm!"
Keith began making this weird helpless gasping sound, and it went on long enough that we were starting to get worried that he was having some kind of seizure, until he finally managed, "Trick arm!" Then we realized that he'd merely been struck helpless with laughter and we resumed watching the movie.
It probably would not have been catapulted to such greatness if we hadn't gone to Subway for dinner afterwards. We were sitting on the floor of my bedroom, eating, and Mike had put the last (slightly large) bite of his sandwich in his mouth when someone said something funny and he stifled a laugh.
"Laugh, Mike, laugh!" Keith commanded. "Trick arm trick arm trick arm!"
Mike had to spit out what was left of his sandwich...and history was made.
Why was that phrase not in our damn movie?
* * *
Anyway, ep 10 of Motto ToLoveRu has a lot of Yui-chan in it, for which I'm grateful.
What part of "otaku" do you still not get?